Today, I had my psychologist appointment. We talked about CBT (cognitive-behavioral therapy) and how it is used, and the principle of it.
I enjoyed it, we have to work out why I am afraid to be by myself, in case something bad will happen. We have to work out possibly what triggered that, and turn those subconscious thoughts into positive ones.
She also suggested that I try my anxiety medication that I was prescribed by my doctor. I’m a bit hesitant to take it, and case something bad happens. She only suggested for me to take quarter of a pill . When people are around, so that I am safe.
I will try that between now and when I see her in January next year.
We discussed about panic, and how it makes me feel. I told her that it makes me feel shaky, heart racing, unable to breathe properly, and it makes me need water really quickly, so I have to rush to the sink and drink it really fast.
I told her how I was over protected by my parents. How theyq would only guide me, and not let me use my cane to get around. I told her how I relied on them a lot , instead of trusting myself. I explained to her this maybe why I am afraid to be on my own, I told her this is one of my theories. It doesn’t mean that my theory is the reason why I’m afraid. I’m not really sure why I am, . Nothing bad has ever happened to me before. And it is likely that nothing will ever happen to me that is bad. I don’t know why I worry about it so much. Even though it is a subconscious thought, it is enough to send me into panic. I really don’t understand what is so scary. Hopefully within these next 6 appointmentss that I have with my psychologist, I will be able to figure things out.
Thanks for reading.
I’ll blog again soon.