feeling a little sad.

So, today, i’m feeling sad. I don’t know how to get through this worrying about another seizure  thing. I am worried about it happening again. since it has already happened once, it could again.

I know that because I’m on medication, it will lessen the chances of it happening, but there is still that chance, and I don’t want to take that chance. I don’t like the idea of being on my own if something like that were to happen.

I am just really not sure what to do.

I kind of am starting to feel bad about myself, because I was doing so well with regard to my anxiety, and fixing it, and now I can’t even stay here by myself again.

I just wish I could be better. I just don’t know how to do it.

I just hate it so much, and I wish people would try to understand it more. it frustrates me when they don’t understand what i’m going through. People say things like, “O, your not going to die”

Its not death i’m worried about, its having a seizure by myself, and having to call for my own ambulance, that is what i’m worried about.

It scares me to even think of that happening.

Also, getting verbally abused hurts me too. When people call me names because I don’t lend my dad  money for his  own stupid smokes.

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